Shop owner: You like Smartwool?
802BIKEGUY: I love Smartwool!
Shop owner: Want some free Smartwool socks? [Wife's name] says I can’t have the same color socks as she does as she’ll never be able to tell the sizes apart in the laundry and the return process with [vendor] is cumbersome.
Ah, women… In other news I am very excited to be attending Interbike for the first time. I’ll be there Wed & Thursday. My one must find schwag item is a tape measure that is both feet/inches and centimeters. Surly was handing these out least year but I wasn’t there last year. Much easier to measure road bike frames when you have a tape measure that has centimeters. I am about to peruse the list of 1000+ vendors and do some highlighting to make sure I visit those in which I am interested. I spent about 30 minutes formatting the list in Excel and I could only get it down to 12 pages! And that’s with 6 point type! In jest, I plan on suggesting to as many helmet manufacturers as I can, that they should make a German spike style bicycle helmet. I would totally wear one, and the spike would make an excellent light mount.
I’ve lately been lax at wearing nitrile gloves while wrenching on bikes. My hands are starting to show permanent grease stains even after using commercial hand cleaners. As I was drinking some homebrew the other day I thought to myself, I should have some secret ingredient in the beers I brew. Hey, what if I stuck both my hands into the wort (pre boil of course) and left some minute traces of the various dirt, grease, metal and rubber I come into contact with as a bike mechanic. Bike Wrench Brewing. Nice ring, but perhaps too unsanitary in an ordinary person’s mind. I’m sure that more than one sub sandwich I’ve eaten has borne the traces of your worn out tires, coagulated chain lubricants and steel from your mistreated bearing races.
Post Interbike report to follow in some number of days yet to be determined, including a list of schwag ranked from best to worst with snarky comments thrown in for good measure.